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unless stated, none of these photos were taken by me
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From time to time images are mysteriously deleted by Photofuckit, I cannot stop this. Whenever possible, I will do my best to alter entries with missing images.
12:36 pm - 02.07.05
i'll have the honey-roasted mutant drumsticks with the rat urine cola
I Want to thank all of you who have taken the time and trouble to send me
your damn chain letters over the past two years.
Thank you for making me feel safe, secure, blessed, and wealthy.
Because of your concern... I no longer can drink Coca Cola because it can remove toilet stains.
I no longer drink Pepsi or Dr Pepper since the people who make these products are
atheists who refuse to put "Under God" on their cans.
I no longer drink anything out of a can because I will get sick from the rat feces and urine.
I no longer use Saran wrap in the microwave because it causes cancer.
I no longer check the coin return on pay phones because
I could be pricked with a needle infected with AIDS.
I no longer use cancer-causing deodorants
even though I smell like a water buffalo on a hot day.
I no longer go to shopping malls because someone will drug me with a perfume sample and rob me.
I no longer receive packages from UPS or FedEx since they are actually Al Qaeda in disguise.
I no longer shop at Target since they are French and don't support our American troops.
I no longer answer the phone because someone will ask me to dial a stupid number
for which I will get the phone bill from hellwith calls to Jamaica , Uganda , Singapore , and Uzbekistan.
I no longer eat KFC because their chickens are actually horrible mutant
freaks with no eyes or feathers.
I no longer date the opposite sex because they will take my kidneys
and leave me taking a nap in a bathtub full of ice.
I no longer have any sneakers...
but that will change once I receive my free replacement pair from Nike.
I no longer buy expensive cookies from Neiman Marcus since I now have their recipe.
I no longer worry about my soul because I have 363,214 angels looking out for me
and St Theresa's novena has granted my every wish.
Thanks to you, I have learned that God only answers my prayers if I forward an email to seven
of my friends and make a wish within five minutes. (Jeeze, the BIBLE did not mention it works that way!)
I no longer have any savings because I gave it to a sick girl who is about to die in the
hospital (for the 1,387,258th time).
I no longer have any money at all, but that will change once I receive
the $15,000 that Microsoft and AOL are sending me for participating in their
special e-mail program.
Yes, I want to thank all of you soooooooo much for looking out for me!
I will now return the favor.
If you don't send this e-mail to at least 1200 people in the next 60 seconds, a large bird with diarrhea will crap on your head at 5:00 pm this afternoon and the fleas of a thousand camels will infest your armpits!
ask me about pins - 01-02-08
My 80's Nostalgia Page - 11-02-07
The Incredible Buddha Boy - 10-17-07
youthful energy - 10-15-07
Bizarre Love Triangle - 10-15-07