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From time to time images are mysteriously deleted by Photofuckit, I cannot stop this. Whenever possible, I will do my best to alter entries with missing images.

2:39 pm - 02.21.05
long entry about everything
So still on the never-ending quest to find a life.

I will be calling Co-op houses today, setting up interviews. Tomorrow I shall go to Lifestyles, let them know what I really want from a job.

Try to track down the mysterious stranger from the bookshop, needing a Tarot reader.

So much has happened, so little has happened.

I'm still horribly lonely. Every guy I see, I fight the urge not to jump them. Last night Chad dropped me off at home, after spending the weekend with him and Shannon, and I couldn't stop staring at his lips. We were talking about something, and all the while I was fantasising about what would happen if I leaned over and kissed him? He has this raw, rough sex appeal....Shannon say's he's very dominant in bed. He likes to roleplay and pull her hair.

I bought myself a Valentine's teddy bear, he was on sale at Copps, I named him Toby. Tob, is a name for the Bear, in one of the Tribal story traditions, I cannot remember which.
Toby is about 3ft tall, big and cuddly, made of a comfortably soft fabric. I put a shirt on him, and a pair of my briefs, then stuffed a balled up sock in the crotch.

So until the real thing cums along, Toby is my Bearfriend. The logic being, if I can get used to sleeping with this big thing in my bed, I'll be fine when the real loverboy cums along.
I spent the weekened away from my bed, and I actually missed feeling Toby next to me. He's comforting.

Anyways you can't put underwear on body pillows.

Lets see, I had a job for two days. At a factory making refridgerators. I made over 100 parts, for 100 refridgerators, the works was fine, a lil challenging.
Lotsa hot guys everywhere. Managers was an asshole, HIS name was Ernell, yes it had a dick, with a girly name.

bald jerkoff fucker.

But I digress, the mandatory $60 steel-toed boots were killing my feet, I came home one of my toes had a huge black blister, filled with blood and puss. A few more hours of that horrible pain, and I would've lost a toe!
So I quit, took the responsibility, fucked myself over, but followed my heart and got out.

So I'm reading a book, "American Gods" by Neil Gaimen, awesome book. Go read it.
I can't really say I'm reading the book though, because it's really reading me. Specific circumstances of my life right now, are in that book.

This book takes your ideas of faith and the culture you grew up with, and twists it up. Another plus is most of the book takes place in the midwest, and travels all over Wisconsin! It's great reading a fiction book that takes place where you live.

All of your favorite Gods and Goddesses are in this book. Odin, Kali, Anansi, Ganesh, Horus, Anubis, and many more. They all live and work in America now, as cabbies, morticians, news anchors, resturaunteurs, and travelling con-men. It's an absurd book, in some places it borders on erotic (look for the gay cabbie sex!), read this book!

Tonight I'm going to call a guy who emailed me from Your House, I talked to him briefly on Yahoo. He lives in New York, he's 31, and his name is Steve.

That's all I know.

And ya never know, but I get the idea he wants to live there, and wants me to live there too. So who knows, long distance friendships are hard, but they can be done, if you keep in touch. :)

Hunter S. Thompson died Sunday, he shot himself. I guess madmen do prefer suicide. I've never read any of his books, only snipits of the first Fear and Loathing book. I've wanted to see the movie, but it got way to much hollywood hype, for such an un-hollywood movie. I'm turned off by hype, unless it's weird and involves some measure of male nudity.

I won't meet him in a bar or club or artsy coffee shop, I hope I meet him while doing something spiritual or pagan, that would rock. I'm more receptive during those times.

Ossie Davis is dead as well, he'll be missed. He was on a great show with Burt Reynolds in the 90's, I don't remember the name of the show, but that funny short balding red-haired guy, who was in one of the Air Budd movies, he played a character called "Nub". Funny lil crazy guy with a wagon, I think he was homeless. It was a nice shopw, with a lil comedy a lil drama, the right balance. And I remember how good Ossie was in that role.
Truth be told, I went to see Driving Miss Daisy for Jessica Tandy, I love it when she plays the feisty old grandma. But I appreciated Ossie as an actor even more after that role.

Jessica was really good in "To Dance With The White Dog", she made that with her real life husband, Hume Crome. In the movie she dies, and her spirit comes back in the form of a big fluffy white dog. Ironically, Jessica Tandy died shortly after making that film.

So many of the master entertainers are leaving us, Johnny Carson, Arthur Miller, Ossie Davis, and now Hunter S. Thompson.

The only man who I believe could say he inspired a comic strip character and a muppet (Doonesbury's Uncle Duke, and Gonzo).

My nails keep breaking, I only stopped drinking milk about a month ago, and already the effects are showing. It's odd though, I'm eating more green leafy veggitables and I still drink chocolate milk, but still it's not enough, I guess.

I'm hanging out with Susie and Becca tomorrow, I think, I'm not sure.

I will be getting paid for the two days, so maybe I'll have enough to get my puter fixed.


ask me about pins - 01-02-08
My 80's Nostalgia Page - 11-02-07
The Incredible Buddha Boy - 10-17-07
youthful energy - 10-15-07
Bizarre Love Triangle - 10-15-07